At work, you're a god. You do good work, keep your head down, you use the right cover sheets on your TPS reports, and yet the pencil pushers won't leave you alone. Quarterly reviews, one-on-ones, mandatory human-resources sensitivity training, and hokey team-building exercises ensure your soul is crushed in the intractable wheels and cogs of the corporate machine.
Then there's the guy down your cube row who happily traipses through the day, apparently untouched by the evil that surrounds you. What's the difference? He's got lots of lucite on his bookshelf. Ah, lucite - the clear glassy plastic with laser-etched logos and recognition of achievement... what did this guy do that got him all the attention? It's all a popularity contest. Like Peter Gibbons himself realized, it's more about style than substance. The worst part is, the more of these awards you have, the more you end up getting.
Office Space Crystal Award
